Rolling With Life's Punches

Well today was suppose to be my week 3 recap, but today life gave me a speed bump that I had to process instead.

The detective assigned to my assault case notified me that there was now sufficient evidence to arrest and prosecute my attacker. They just need my go-head to press charges. It's been five months of waiting to get to this point. Part of me kinda forgot about it. I've moved on and processed the trauma. At least I thought I did. Talking about moving forward with charges brought on a whole wave of emotions.

Charges would mean that I would have to face him in court. Tell my story in front of a jury of strangers. Have my life and choices that night picked a part by the defense. That's a scary thought. It was so overwhelming in that moment that I couldn't give an answer. I couldn't even finish my work day.

I let myself feel my emotions and take time for myself rather than pushing them down. I took a nap and went to a friends house so I wasn't by myself. It helped to talk about things and just hang out. We watched the stand-up Douglas by Hannah Gadsby. She is HILARIOUS! Do not watch this if you are easily offended....or do? and grow a funny bone!

We order some Qdoba. I got a steak quesadilla with pico and it was so good. I knew I was looking for comfort in my food, which I'm trying not to. I want to use healthy coping skills instead of eating. I'm also trying to not feel guilty for having carbs. FOOD IS NOT MY ENEMY! At least that's what I'm telling myself. Hopefully I believe it one day.

When I went home the BF held me and we talked about it. I'm going to press charges. Not enough women come forward and get the chance to make their attackers pay for their crimes. He shouldn't be free to victimize another woman if I can help it. It's going to be a process. Possibly a long process. But I have a support system to help me through it and honestly I've done a lot of mental growth since the incident. I'm still on my 90 day journey for balance. This is just a life challenge that I know I can work through.

We ended the evening visiting with some of the BF's family. Nice and relaxing. They even had cheesecake! YUM!

Here's to smiling through the good and bad times.

Next up will be the week 3 recap!

Till then!

-K